Sometimes, everyday experiences can teach us better boundaries.
Last week, my phone rang. “Go to the door, but don’t open it,” my husband said. I was sitting in my office, which faces the backyard. Since Tom’s wedding vows specifically stated that he’d never fail to alert me to a puppy or other cute animal, I trusted that I was in for something good.
I walked over to the glass door and peered across the backyard. There were two ducks floating around in our swimming pool. They were doing their little duck ruffly thing, paddling their tiny duck feet, and otherwise living their best duck lives.
We stood there for several minutes admiring nature at its finest and Tom convinced our dog, Buddy, that he needn’t bark his way across the backyard to defend his territory. (Our other dog is blind and deaf and wouldn’t know if a duck was sharing his bed). Then we went back to work, and I posted the story on Facebook with a request for good duck names.
Another Perspective
Cut to a few days later when we related this beautiful story to the pool guy.
“I fired a client for that,” he said.
“But they’re so cute…”
“They are disgusting and will poop all over everything. It gets in the filter and makes it damn near impossible to clean. My old client decided to start feeding them, and they brought their entire family to poop in the pool.”
I mean, we weren’t that bad. We hadn’t fed Howard and Gertrude just yet.
“It took me hours to do a job that should’ve taken 20 minutes. I fired them,” he said. “Get rid of the ducks.”
Boundaries in Action
My husband assured him that we’d let Buddy do his thing next time they dared to darken our backyard, and when the pool guy left, I turned to Tom and said…
“The pool guy just set a boundary. Good for him!”
You knew we’d get there eventually, didn’t you?
If you are an entrepreneur, a business owner, or even a salesperson within an organization, you have some say in who you start working with and who you continue working with. But how do you know when it’s time to say goodbye?
When Should You Fire a Client?
- They Violate Your Boundaries
Once you’ve communicated how you are willing to be treated, the way in which you will communicate (and when you will be available), and the scope of the work you will do, it’s up to your client to respect those boundaries. Note: You must actually tell them! If you haven’t communicated any of this and just get angry with your clients for not reading your mind… well, that’s on you.
We didn’t know how much damage a duck can do to a pool. If our pool guy hadn’t told us and let us know that he wouldn’t continue working on our pool if we made his job more difficult, well, that wouldn’t have been good business. However, since he did, it’s now up to us to respect his boundaries.
- They Ask You to Violate Your Boundaries
You have an internal set of boundaries. They are called your “morals.” There are certain things you are willing to do, and certain things you are not. If you were to do them, would they land you in jail? Possibly not. However, they might cause you to take an extra-long shower just to get the “yuck” off of you.
When a client asks you to do something (like cut a corner or “borrow” material from someone else) that makes you uncomfortable, it’s your responsibility to let them know you won’t do that. Of course, the client is always right… they just may not be right for you. It’s okay to release them from their contract if they continue to insist you do something you aren’t comfortable doing.
Conclusion
Of course, it bears mentioning that boundaries go both ways. Your clients will have expectations as to how they are treated. If you don’t respect that, they have every right (and responsibility) to fire you.
You’ve worked hard to get where you are today. Trust that when you demand respect and release the clients who don’t fall into line, they will be replaced with clients who do.
For more tips on setting healthy boundaries in your personal and professional life, visit YouHadMeAtNo.com. And if you need to get rid of some ducks, Buddy is for hire.
Is there a boundary you need to communicate?
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